Posts tagged Drug

Question by LilLoca: My boyfriends mum is a drug addict/dealer, and is going to jail – should i stay with him?
I have known him since May 2004, and we have been together since November 2005 (so quite a while). I have known for a while that his mum had a drug habit. I was told that before i met him she was addicted to heroin, but now she was over the habit and was just a pot smoker. When i was at his house, there were people always there in her room, who he said were people after drugs. Slowly over time he told me that it seemed like she was into speed now (her lesbian lover died 2 years so it’s possible she started back on the speed because of the heartbreak).

A couple days ago she got arrested and now she’s facing a year or more in jail (advice from solicitor), and its turned out she lied to my bf and was arrested before (but let go), and is now addicted on heroin again.

He’s told me so many stories about her – apparently she did heroin when she was pregnant with him (his dad is a “junkie” too, but left before he was born). When he was a kid she would leave him days on end to go “do drugs” – he was around 9 fyi. She also traded in their tv and his games for money to fund her drug habit. When he started working after he finished school she apparently a couple times took his bankcard in the middle of the night and stole up to 600 dollars each time and never returned it. Since i’ve met him, once a week without fail she asks him for money (she doesnt work – is on a disability pension because she’s “sick”). I really dont see any sickness in her, she’s fine and can walk around everything, but im not a doctor so i wont judge her for that. So ok, she doesnt work, gets a pension + rent assitance (which totals to about 550/fortnight maybe more), he pays all the bills, the rent (220/week), the food in the house – yet she STILL asks him for money. I dont even know for what!! She lives in squallor!! Her room is tiny, she only stays in there with her “friends”. All i can think of is she spends it on her drug habit which INFURIATES ME!! She just uses him and because he’s soft he always gives into it everytime – he’ll shout at her, but then eventually gives in and gives her money. This is in the field of 200 a week (he payed her 400 for a mobile phone the other week because she was “broke” and she promised to pay him back – she hasnt).

The reason all this angers me (and i know i guess its not my business), is just the fact that this woman her entire life has amounted to nothing. She brings down her son EVERYTIME. I hate listening to all this from him because everytime i try to tell her off to him he defends her and calls me a bitch. I know she is his mum, but how can he not see what she is! We want to move out, eventually buy a house, marry and have kids. I want to travel, and i know he does as well, but every week when we go out he’s telling me he’s struggling for cash. When i ask him to lend me 20 dollars (im a uni student, so im struggling for cash atm), he tells ME off!! It’s so frustrating, i feel like his dysfunctional relationship with his mum is making him distrust me.

She’s going to jail ffs, and he still thinks she has hope. She came home from the court house today and already there were people at the door waiting for drugs saying “your mum called saying to meet her here”. It’s like hello! She’s not going to change, she’s a lost cause.

Am i right to feel like this? Is it right that im angry at her and even him for putting up with her? Is it my business? And should i even stay with him if he’s going to support her? I can’t support a drug addict/dealer. It’s just too much!

Best answer:

Answer by Olaola
comfort him
its times like these he needs you the most
i didnt read that all..cuz frankly tbh its a bit too much
but i read the title

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